The Sunday Spectacular Vol. 2

The other week I had the pleasure of dining with my dear friend Lindy.  Speaking with Lindy is how I imagine one might feel when speaking with a guru, enlightened and edified.  She is pretty much a life master with the wisdom of Yoda and the beauty of Reese Witherspoon.  For extra credit she was a cheerleader in college, of the peppy blonde variety.  On paper we could not be any more different, aside from the blonde hair, but we get along famously!

     

Over a perfectly positioned rectangular plate of mahi mahi tacos and meatloaf (it was grilled and prepared like a steak...really not your average "meatloaf") we stumbled upon the subject of trial in our lives.  We talked about our struggles, our families' struggles.  My heart felt like it was going to burst.  We shared stories in hushed tones from our families' lives that rarely escape our mouths.  We determined that people have such great burdens on them that are invisible to the outside world.  We sat shaking our heads back and forth, astonished at what some people are enduring and how no one has any idea.  

When looking at another person's life it is all too easy to jump to harsh conclusions.  "I know better!"  "Why can't they change this?"  "Clearly, they're not doing it right."  We just see a whole lot of the superficial and as flawed human beings we can be so quick to judge, when we really see a teeny tiny fraction of what is really going on behind the curtain.  Judging can be such a dangerous thing and this is why:  We have NO way of knowing the background, experiences, or challenges of others. 

Over the course of our meal we came full circle back to square one:  Our Problems.  After diving into the caves and hidden crevices of others' trials our problems didn't feel as grave.  Comparison led us to an interesting mind game (the good kind).  We imagined that if we took the hand of trials we’ve been dealt in life, laid our cards out on the table and could pick another hand, we would end up keeping our own problems; they are familiar to us, difficult and painful but ours.  We can handle them.  We can grow from them.  Lindy and I could see our customized learning curricula before us.  What an excellent game to play!

 

My Mother (another sage) has often said that if you treat everyone like they are going through the hardest time of their lives, 98% of the time you will be right.  I know this.  I have heard it dozens of times, so why is it so hard to remember?  This week compassion and kindness is my goal, being grateful for the hand I have been dealt, and dining on more meatloaf with Lindy for enlightenment.